On Being a Celebrity

Being a celebrity is difficult… Sure, it has its obvious benefits, but, as a human being, I also find it so strange sometimes.

For instance, Tom Cruise might call me up out of the blue and say “hey, Rian, it’s Tom Cruise…” as though he expects me to drop everything to speak to him because he’s a more powerful member of the celebrity tribe.  Well, you know what, I don’t care to speak to Tom.  I find his choice of religion, and unquestioning adherence thereto, to be off-putting.  The only thing that we have in common is fame.

What if Robert Mugabe called me one day and said “hey, Rian, it’s Bob Mugabe…” No, I’m sorry, I know he’s a celebrity, too, but I am not going to have a telephone conversation with a ruthless dictator.

On the other hand, were a call to get through to me from someone like Britney Spears, I might just take it.  You know why?  She needs support.  She needs to talk to another celebrity who’s kept his perspective to help her find her own.  I may not like her music.  I may find her behavior like that of a spoiled child throwing a tantrum.  But she’s a person.  Maybe I can help.

My point is this: being a celebrity is just my job.  I’m just a normal guy like you.  I consume nutrients.  I excrete.  I submit to nightly stasis and regeneration.

So, when you see me on the street (perhaps in a photo or billboard), please don’t idolize me or torture yourself with envy.  Believe me, it’s not as easy or fun as you might think.  The fame is just an incidental offshoot of my talent, and that’s something that came from God.