About Urban Hayseed

I have heard the voice of the people crying out for a profile. Very well, filthy unwashed masses, here’s your profile.

This is me. You will note my well-formed ears. I often forget to shave. I have large hands.

The garden obsession, I think, comes from an odd background of coming from North Dakota with a family history deeply tied to the earth and not being able to remember growing so much as a tomato as a kid while growing up in Northern Minnesota. I do recall that we had raspberries for a time on the back fence of our (lawn) yard. I don’t know how they got there, and since we had know idea what to do with them, they didn’t last.

All I remember about gardening or being outside was smoking the little straws that were left behind by the grasses in the empty field next to our house.  We did have a nice rhubarb patch for a while.  I have to imagine my mom planted that before Gloria Steinem threw the whole place into chaos.  Gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet though, eh?

My family will read this and say that I’m crazy and that we all lived happily outside and self-sufficiently farmed our yard and maybe raised sheep. Who knows. All I remember is blowing up anthills with firecrackers and trapping robins under cardboard boxes propped up with a stick tied to a string. I thought that what we called “food” back then came from a store. I mean, originally. And I am not mentally retarded.

I hate everything Monsanto stands for and am disheartened that they are allowed and encouraged to do what they do. I feel similarly about people talking about drilling off the coast for more oil when the oil companies are making record profits. Americans don’t want to deal with reality sometimes. If you keep buying all the oil, it will continue to cost more. Eventually, it will start to run out. Making oil into fertilizer, spreading it on genetically engineered corn, and then turning that into ethanol is moronic. Judging the attractiveness of your food purely on the basis of cost is similarly ill-advised. I don’t WANT a $.99 hamburger, thanks.

I want to part ways with the industrial food system to the degree possible. I try to grow a lot of our food. I raise chickens. I bake. I buy locally and organically when it’s reasonable. However, I am not a religious zealot, though my friends may disagree. The older I get, the more I talk like a hippie. I know say things like “industrial food system” and debate the merits of biointensive gardening over permaculture food forests. Like, groovy, man!

Finally, I’m married with two kids. I’ve lived in Minnesota, California, Japan, and Oregon. I’ve got a degree in electrical engineering and an MBA (you’re surprised, right?) I’m 40ish. 6′ tall and putting on weight due to lack of the ability to muster enthusiasm for exercise anymore. If I have that time, I’ll work in the garden. Oh, and beer.

And I don’t like raw celery.

I think that’s it.